Tuesday, November 02, 2004

It's 11:57pm -- do you know who your president is?

All the networks are projecting Bush. Kerry / Edwards are still hoping for the keystone state, Ohio. Neither G nor I see how that's even plausible.

Yeah, I understand that Gore gave up too easily last time. So Kerry is going to play this out. It's not the same scenario, though. Stringing this out is going to cause resentment. Not that I care personally. This whole notion that we have to know who the president is tonight -- why? The president won't be sworn in until January. ...The argument that we're at war, and the nation must show unity -- I don't buy it. Obviously we're divided. Live with it.

But on a personal level, I have to decide: when do I go to bed tonight? I think it's time to go to sleep. In the morning, maybe there'll be a miracle. But I'm at the point where I'm getting mentally prepared to wake up to four more years.

I didn't get too anxious about the election. Call it a streak of fatalism. We had to fight leading up to this decision. We'll have to fight next week, and next year, and into the future. The fight never ends. There is no victory. And so, patience.

This sucks. This hurts badly. It hasn't sunk in. And I'm not sure I want it to sink in. Just keep working.

If, as it seems, we have Bush -- then we've got a president who's going to continue taking us to war, gutting women's ownership of their bodies, working to reinstate the male-headed hetero adult supremacist household. Damn. And a president who, I believe, doesn't mind precipitating an apocalypse because he expects to pop up to heaven when the rapture comes.

...We lost the No on 36 campaign -- and we lost this issue in 10 other states, too. It makes me mad at the national queer leadership. Why was this the issue to pursue at this time? Why have we been led to a defeat that reinforces hetero supremacism's hold?

I'm not a political strategist when it comes to electoral stuff. I was asking myself today: what would I take to really understand this form of politics, become an expert in it? ...I don't think I have it in me.

But I do have it in me to be an ideological wonk. I wonder to myself if there's anything I can contribute in the long run in the message arena. ...But that's just fantasy. We've lost, and the country is a Swifty Tilting Planet. The game we need to play for the next twenty years... it's going to have to be about small tweaks in our opponents' thinking. The right's vision of home and family is consolidated, and growing every stronger. The liberation movements of the 60s/70s haven't imagined a true future yet; our voice is still merely critical. It's not enough.

I find myself wanting to depose Jesus. I have the impression that America voted for Bush because he's the candidate of the Jesus party. The term "culture war" seems more and more accurate to me. "Non-discrimination" is not a culture -- it's the absence of a negative. Nor do I think "diversity" is the message we need. As I've seen it practiced, teaching diversity requires learning the details of each cultural group... Which I enjoy personally -- but it's my form of knowing the names of football teams; football enthusiasts aren't going to want to learn about all my teams...

I want to hear our side talking about our fundamental principles. "Equality", despite being there in the Declaration of Independence ("all men are created equal") isn't it. We need to start from the principle of owning one's own body. From there we can derive pro-choice and anti-domestic violence positions. We can talk about the history of power difference and what needs to happen to create true enfranchisement -- whereas pursuing equality leads to a flawed attempt to treat all people identically. Something that works poorly when it comes to disabilities, age, and pregnancy.

Grrrr. I'm going off about the issues near and dear to my heart because... What else do I have to cling to?

Today is a very bad day.

May the forces that move the world have mercy as they deal out our fate.

[No... It's not so much about property rights as they apply to people's bodies... It's more about one's personal future and the vision of "family". Getting married, having kids, sounds like a good deal. An escape from the loneliness of existence. Preserving that nucleus of comfort -- that's what it's all about. Grrr...]

Go to bed, Sven.

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